My Husband Picks Porn Over Me

I visit your site all the time because I enjoy your posts and reading people's comments. I especially like the reader submissions and the advice you give.
I have an issue that I need a little advice on.
I've been married for 4 years and me and my husband's sex life isn't the greatest, but it's not the worse either. It's no where near where it used to be when we first got married, not because i'm not willing to have sex with him, but because he's just not into the sex the way he used to be.
I think there are 2 main reasons why.
For one I have picked up a considerable amount of weight since I had our twin girls, who are my world, and secondly he watches a lot of pornography.
I think my weight gain has caused him to not be as attracted to me as he once was and I think he uses porn as an outlet to fulfill the fantasies he has about women who are more on par with what he wants physically. Plus the women in these movies do things i'm not necessarily willing to do.
I can even recall a time where we had sex and I could tell he was just going through the motions and wasn't really into it. I had fallen asleep afterwards and just so happened to wake up in the middle of the night and noticed he wasn't in the bed.
When I walked into the living room I caught him in front of the computer masturbating to a porno movie and it made me feel so down about myself.
There have been other times where we'll be in bed and he'll think i'm sleep and get up out the bed in the middle of the night and go in the living room and get on the computer. I have never confronted him about it, but I know what he's doing. But it leaves me wondering why he would resort to that when i'm right here in bed with him.
Do you think I should confront him about this or am I just blowing this situation out of proportion?



SpeekDaTroof: I think you should definitely say something about it, because it's obvious that it bothers you. If you continue to let this go on without confronting the issue it could end up destroying your marriage.


Communication is the biggest problem in this situation...He's not telling you why he's turning to adult movies for pleasure and you're not expressing how much it bothers you.


Maybe you two can reach a common ground in the situation...If he tells you it's a physical thing, you may want to consider trying to shed a few pounds or if it's something the women in the movies do that he likes that you don't do, you might want to discuss it and maybe consider being a little more open minded in the bedroom, just as long as it's something you're not uncomfortable with, but you two definitely need to have a discussion about these issues before the situation gets too out of hand.