SpeekDaTroof: An Interesting Discussion I Had With 2 Mothers

I was having a very good discussion with 2 women yesterday about a variety of subjects and the topic about motherhood and their approach to dealing with men and how they handle their relationships with men as it relates to their children.

One of the women told me she had an experience where she got wind of her son making a comment about the fact that his respect for her would diminish somewhat for a decision she was making as far her dealings with a particular man. She told me that when she was told this her first reaction was to smack him, which she said she did.

She said he never uttered those words to her, but him and his sister had discussed it and she went back and told that the son had mentioned how he felt to her and the mother just reacted once she heard about his comments. Now to make things clearer, the decision she was making was to get a man she's f*cking with (not her man, just someone she deals with from time to time, who she says she really cares about) name tattooed on her, but at the same time she has gotten a number of other men's names tattooed on her body in the past that didn't work out, so I kind of felt where her son was coming from.

I had to explain to her that if I were in her position, I wouldn't have hit my son just because of hearing how my decision would affect his view of me. I would have sat down and talked to my son and allowed him to give me his point of view about why he felt that way, and gave him mine about why i'm making this choice.

I feel like smacking him is not going to make him respect your decision any more, and maybe even less, and like I told her technically he didn't disrespect you, you just know how he would have felt had you went through with that decision, where as if you hadn't heard about it, he would have felt the same way and you just wouldn't have known.

Now the second mother was saying as long as your mom is doing what she has to do for you as her child it shouldn't matter what she does as far as her personal life and choices, and you should never lose respect for her because of those choices.

I totally disagreed, and gave her an example of what I meant...I basically said that if my mom was doing everything she's suppose to for me, but was being a complete h#e, I would lose some degree of respect for her irregardless because of how she's conducting herself.

She then asked me what my definition of a h*e was, and I told her that my definition of a h%e is a female who just sleeps around with a bunch of guys with basically no regard. She said that's not a h*e because she sleeps around with multiple men and she doesn't consider herself to be a h*e.

She went on to say that she sleeps with any guy she feels a sexual vibe with and during the course of the average week she may sleep with 4 or 5 different men, but she never takes them to her house, so her children never see these men.

Now her children are in their teens, and i'm sure that even though she's not bringing the men home, they can put 2 and 2 together, but she feels that because she's not exposing them to all these men she sleeps around with that she's not a h#e. She said that if she were bringing all these guys home for them to see, she would be a h*e, but because she's not she's just a woman who's sleeping around.

Honestly, when she said that sh%t, I couldn't do anything but shake my head, But I want ya'll input on this and I also have a couple questions concerning our discussion...

#1. Would you go through with a decision that you knew before hand would loose the respect of your child?

#2. As long as a parent does what they have to do for their child, should that child always have respect for them irregardless of the way that parent conducts themselves?